Rational Nation USA

WASHINGTON — Placing an anonymous phone call to report a foul smell emitting from the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases director’s home, officials from the Trump administration reportedly planted 137,000 corpses in Anthony Fauci’s bed Monday to frame him for the country’s coronavirus deaths. “We finally got the guy responsible for coronavirus,” said White House press secretary Kayleigh McEnany, who cited police reports that found information on the coronavirus dating back to January on Fauci’s laptop. “Police had good reason to believe Fauci is the perpetrator of Covid-19 after linking him to past pandemics. They found hundreds of video interviews where he relentlessly talked about coronavirus. He’d clearly developed some kind of obsession. You know, 130,000 dead bodies don’t just appear by accident.” At press time, authorities suspected that Fauci was working with an accomplice after the coronavirus death toll continued to increase despite his arrest. 

WASHINGTON —In a very serious and damning new report published Wednesday, a government watchdog group has found that, as early as January, White House officials failed to heed repeated warnings of impending doom that arrived via four skeletal horsemen galloping through the sky. “On Jan. 3, the Trump administration received its first notification that a quartet of ghostly riders had barreled out of the endless night—auguring death, despair, and a great cataclysm upon the earth—but the president did not begin to take the threat seriously until mid-March,” said Douglas Reisenthaler of the nonpartisan Institute for Federal Policy, a co-author of the report compiled from interviews with sources who asked to remain anonymous because they were not authorized to discuss torrents of blood raining from the Oval Office ceiling and flooding the West Wing. “For 10 full weeks, during which the White House could have been using the vast resources at its disposal to prepare for the f...

We simply must have a very large picture of the Three Stooges (above) to commemorate the the new monument our congress (no caps here) authorized "in recognition of mankind's inherent propensity for tragically foolish decisions." Congress has allocated nearly $500 billion dollars of taxpayers money  to construct a national monument to honor human folly. What a wonderfully irresponsible thing to spend taxpayers money on. Oops, almost forgot we must have an apprprieate monument to commemorate the election of Barrack Hussein Obama to the Presidency of The United States. This just in from The Onion . Read the full story here. Via: Memeorandum Via: the Onion